Grabbed an opportunity yesterday to see a movie I’ve heard so much about. Have you seen it yet? You NEED to. My goal today is not to spoil it for you, simply to share about a subject that hits home for me. Perhaps it will resonate with you as well.
It’s rough. In fact, it can actually knock us out for the count. For me, it was my greatest fear. I feared other’s rejection to an extreme. So much so that I avoided it at all costs, no matter what it called for. Growing up, I could morph into a human chameleon in all sorts of setting. I was an observer of humans. I always took good notes. Came natural to me.
In this movie, there is rejection of all different types. Rejection amongst women, women of different races, woman of similar races, career rejection, societal rejection, and even one’s own body rejecting itself. The systemic behavior could be traced to jealousy, anger over injustice, self-righteousness, intolerance, or even simple happenstance. Whichever way you slice it, it cuts deep. At times, wounds to the death.
So how do we respond in the face of rejection? We know it happens. We’ve seen it. Perhaps we’ve even lived it. It initially crushes. And then what? As the characters of this movie each lived it out different, you saw their ultimate humanity and inevitably, their hearts and attitudes shine through. God asks us to love our enemies. How do we put our flesh on that and actually live it out?
I just returned from a run. As I ran today, I found myself processing. I realize that in my “processing”, I have the tendency to re-hash, and in the repetitive re-hashing I can become bitter. Perhaps if I just think about it again, a new resolution will appear, a new justification. I crave justice. It was no different today. Yet today, I have the desire to release, I just wasn’t quite sure how to do that. I’m releasing my thoughts, knowing that this relationship or circumstance will not change. And I hear a word…
Wow… It is about that. I need to forgive. Even if this person never asks for it. I need to forgive. I’m commanded to forgive. With forgiveness, I am set free. I want that. Time to process some more, Lord will you show me…