I found myself facing this dilemma today – how do I make a decision when my heart wants to dare to believe and dream, while my head wants to compute things logically, practically? What happens is I find myself changing my “mind”, too many times to count. Not sure about you, but this leaves me drained, tired, frustrated. What’s a girl to do?
Well, my head starts to make lists, and my heart cries out to the One who created it. In my prayers for wisdom and discernment, I’m often left with… silence. The phrase, “silence is golden” does have some truth to it, yet it can frustrate the heck out of my emotions. Perhaps it’s the child in me that wants what I want, and wants it right now. Perhaps my dilemma lies in the battle between my logical head that wants to keep me from disappointment, disillusionment, and pain, and my heart that dares to dabble in the exciting possibilities of what-ifs.
Either way, I do believe that both are important, both my head and my heart serve a purpose. If they are at odds, there is a lesson in the middle. Could it be that therein lies an opportunity for faith? Could it be that logic dares to tread the line of pride and declaring my ultimate sovereignty? Could my heart be tossing logic out the window just to follow a whim?
Great things to ponder. Ultimately, an opportunity to lay my will at the feet of my Jesus, and place myself at the altar of His Will.
Lord, this isn’t easy, yet, you didn’t call me to a life of easy. My ultimate goal is to live in each moment for You. Often times it’s not as I would have drawn it up, yet you write for me the reminder that Your ways are higher than mine. I stand on this truth. I stand before you with an open heart, open mind, and open will. Here I am Lord. Send me.
Such an accurate honest description. Love the part about the call to faith. Love that we can pray together in that faith.