To drive, or not to drive…

We had a wonderful opportunity to experience something new on vacation… a wave runner (or jet ski as I like to call it!)  Every other year I had been newly pregnant, newly un-pregnant, or even the food-provider.  This year finds us at a new stage, and I’m enjoyed it!  The boys hit the store one afternoon and came back with some info, and we decided to give it ago!  As the girls enjoyed some put–putt golf with my parents, Aaron, Austin and I had a great morning to literally hit-the-waves for an hour of fun! 

I just couldn’t help but smile as I “watched” our fun-filled hour transpire.  Knowing he was in control of a vehicle with precious cargo, Aaron began with caution.  As we became familiar with our surroundings, with the maneuvering of the machine, and the speed with which to turn, and increasing desire for speed surfaced.  We got this baby up to 50 mph!  I laughed so hard I could barely breathe at times.  It was a hot morning, so with the mist as a welcome friend, coupled with the amazing wind in our hair and the exhilaration of the speed, we just laughed in spite of ourselves. 

After a bit, Aaron and I switched spots at the helm, and I grabbed a hold of the throttle for the first time.  Let’s just say we’re different drivers.  Where Aaron’s cautioous, safe, I have a side of me that just loves to go all-out on an adventure.  We realized that traveling in one direction brought smooth sailing, while traveling in the reverse brought lots of turbulence.  Without realizing, every time we crested a wave and landed hard, my finger holding the throttle gave it just a little more gas each time, we were cruising!  Funny though, after only a few moments, I felt the “Mommy” in me creep up and was more concerned about the possibility of Aaron flying off the back than my need for speed.  I enjoyed the moment, but every part of me was ready to relinquish my role as the driver.  I suddenly had the desire to be the passenger in the worst way.

I caught myself thinking further about this thought.  I found more peace leaving the control to my man.  I found tremendous peace, joy, and even freedom in holding on, closing my eyes, and taking in the moment, more than constantly scanning for my buoy boundaries, checking for fellow jet skiers, and taking control of the speed.  I was perfectly content to relinquish control and simply enjoy the ride.

Have you found this to be true in your relationship with God?  Have you found the passenger seat to be quite enjoyable?  So often I find myself slowly skooching over and taking the reins, only to be disappointed by how little control I really have.  What I thought I wanted, wasn’t really all that great when I had it.  There’s a reason why God has wired me as a wife to find peace in respecting and empowering my husband to take the lead (even if he returns the decision/lead to me), I have shown him respect, his greatest need.  There’s a reason why God tells me to come, and follow Him, leave the control in His hands.  I am limited.  He is not.  I don’t have vision.  He is the one who sees all.  There’s a reason I find peace – my heart, my hope rests in Him.  Thank you for this reminder Jesus.  Help me to remember this peace.  I will want to take control again.  Thank you for a chance to learn more about you each day.  You are more than enough.

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